Will I not vote*, again? No!

Will I not vote*, again? No!
Torrey Orton
July 28, 2010

It's voting time again. Last time (11/2007) I did not vote. Should I not vote, again?

Early in the emergence of democracy, Kant (on 30th September, 1784) wondered "What is enlightenment?" In that short musing he arrived at one of the conditions for public unenlightenment, as follows:

"… The remarkable thing about this is that if the public, which was previously put under this yoke by the 

guardians, is suitably stirred up by some of the latter who are incapable of enlightenment, it may subsequently 

compel the guardians themselves to remain under the yoke. For it is very harmful to propagate prejudices, 

because they finally avenge themselves on the very people who first encouraged them (or whose predecessors

 did so)…."

He seems to claim that a public, in its unenlightened state being in the "yoke", might make its "guardians" keep it unenlightened, keep it in the darkness of prejudice and the unthinking behaviour which blinds it to the realities of its times. That is, keep us under the yoke of tradition, etc. It might also be enlightened guardians themselves, corrupted by hard times, who encourage their brethren to peddle prejudices as enlightening


To read the commentators (who are among our "guardians", supposedly) on the present Australian election campaign, it's hard not to think that we are seeing other guardians, the politicians and some of the commentariat, knowingly keeping the public in the dark by dealing only in "prejudices". Aside from my increasing certainty that our collective ignorance, abetted by our guardians commitment to yoking us in their intramural power struggles, is growing, little else with useful foundations is on offer.


The socio-political context remains much the same as 3 years ago, but with intensified challenges (climate, financial, socio-economic, etc., etc.) and reduced commitment of public authorities, especially the political, to engaging them. There is no discourse but the spun world, hence there is no politics. There is a charade, with tragic undertones.


There is a discourse about life style matters of the rich and famous, modelling the deepest values of our culture to ourselves… and so on. Only two things challenge my commitment to note voting again. The seat of Melbourne has been vacated by a very competent and relatively spin-free Labour pollie, a candidate for membership of the enlightened guardians Kant mentions, who maybe got tired of being dragged by his unenlightened mates backwards into the twilight. This departure increases the chance that a green MP can be elected for the first time, since his replacement has none of the broader public respect that he attracted. As well, Greens are 7ish % off a senate seat quota in Vic, too.


While my overall sense is that it won't make a difference in the grand scheme if they get a seat or not, the small scheme may offer a poke in the eyes of the defective majors. That's hard to pass up since I can't get close enough to poke them personally without committing a crime, or an uproar, at least!


So, I will vote again, if for no other reason than to offer a slight aspirational hand up to acquaintances and friends whose hopes are greater than mine in the here and now that we're in.

Aude sapere**



*In November 2007 I wrote an article published in the now defunct New Matilda titled "I will not vote" arguing that voting in the Australian federal election was an undesirable collusion with the appearances of democratic process in undemocratic conditions. It was not warmly received, even by close acquaintances who were, and still are, more hopeful than I about the conditions for democracy here.


** 'dare to know,' 'have the courage, the audacity, to know.' Foucault, 1984 discussing Kant's challenge to those seeking enlightenment.

Learning to act right (14)… Trusting Judgement

Learning to act right (14)… Trusting Judgement


Torrey Orton
July 21, 2010


Collecting individuals' learning stories is a constant source of wonder. This is not the exception. Rather it is almost a model. It would be a model but for the fact these wondrous works are always models of individual perspicacity and so what is modelled is the effort rather than the form of an action. It is a model perhaps of some problems of our times, seen through the eyes of a youthful participant in them.

 

Trusting Judgement

by Troy

Let me begin with a story…

Here's a situation: you're out fishing in a speed boat. Your line trails in the wake as the boat speeds along. All of a sudden it gives a mighty tug. You are pulled in to the deep water. The boat continues to speed on. As you flail around under water you see that you have hooked something big, but your eyes are blurry in the water, you're not sure whether it's a dolphin or a shark. You're scared. Either way, you're always hearing that more people die from bee stings than shark attacks, surely you will be fine. You come to the surface spluttering and see the fin break the surface, yet you still cannot tell what it is. The creature gives no indication that it is dangerous. In fact it's playful, you see its shadow swimming around under you, doing loop the loops and all sorts of tricks. Underwater you feel it brush against you; there are scars on its skin. This scares you; however it still seems to be just swimming around, friendly… You start having lots of fun playing. Yet every time you feel those scars, your stomach drops. The boat returns and is bobbing nearby- you have the means to immediately extract yourself from the water… And now you have a dilemma. You're scared, but it seems fun. Can something with so many scars be safe? Your friends and family in the boat don't understand your fear; they can't see the scars and your descriptions can't quite capture what you feel as the creature brushes against you. Some are jealous and marvel at how lucky you are, and you feel guilty that you cannot fully appreciate it. The fear makes you tired. You start to worry that you will just drown…

This is a discussion on judgement. The above situation represents my experiences of being thrown straight in the deep end of the relationship game and provides an emotional context for my discussion…


We live in a postmodern society where relativism is highly prized for its ability to give one the freedom and excuse to do whatever one wants, providing you are not directly, or presently hurting anyone. The apparently archaic saying "Judge not lest ye be judged" has been embraced in wider and wider circumstances. People just shrug and say "Whatever floats your boat…" Morals are considered archaic, which is probably fair enough given their destructive use in the past to isolate, persecute and denigrate individuals.


Partner: "How many would you expect?"
Myself: "Well, I'd expect you to be able to count them on your hands…?"


A discussion with my then-partner about his sexual history yielded to me a surprising, and unsettling result- an apparently lengthy history of casual sexual encounters with a high number of different individuals (I say 'apparently' because only after the breakdown of the relationship, months down the track, would I be informed that he was insecure about a lack of sexual encounters and thought to up the number, despite my virginal status. So for all intents and purposes this was the number.) I was unsettled, even repulsed. Yet I was not sure whether I had the right to be:


Friend: "So he didn't actually do anything to you? So what's the problem?"


Good question. What does one do when you make an intuitive value judgement against the behaviour of another? Or, more specifically, the past behaviour of another? Is one allowed to act on it?


Society has tried to condition me to espouse the extreme, almost childish view of freedom- the ability to satiate the id within us. Yet somehow I managed to acquire a different ideal through my family upbringing. This one has a greater awareness of people as family, community, social beings, rather than as George Bernard Shaw says; "feverish, selfish little clot[s] of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy." There is a value structure in my upbringing that upholds respect and care of others as well as the self. Somewhere along the way this value structure began to much more resemble a moral stance. Behaviours that I considered self-destructive or disrespectful became 'wrong.' Engaging in numerous random sexual encounters fell in to this category. This left me floundering. I was already in the water, I'd been having fun, and I was committed. Yet I was confused at my feelings of revulsion. He hadn't done anything to me. It was all 'before my time.' Yet I couldn't shake it.


We discussed it. Over and over. For months. Discussions where we tried to gain an understanding of each other's feelings and positions. Circular discussions, often escalating to tears as we realised we were getting nowhere. Over and over. Tears escalated to convulsions of panic on my behalf. Fear cut at me, as real and as physical as a knife in my gut. The days turned gloomy. All the amazing trips, parties and nights out could never quite distract from the darkness lingering in the back of my head - a darkness that just seemed to take a life of its own, make the future hopeless.
This is the nature of depression. I was not able to recognise it at the time. I knew little about it. But after I got treatment and started psychotherapy, I gained an empowerment. I ended the relationship, a decision that was very difficult at the time, because I still didn't trust my judgement. The action was, however, validated by a confession of deceit by him the day after.


It became immediately apparent to me, the difference in my hope for the future. It really was like the sun had come out. I had a new honours course starting that I could be passionate about. Putting effort into self care, like cooking great food or having a bath with candles and quiet music, these kinds of things assumed an inherent value to me that lifted my esteem. I surrounded myself with friendly people and learnt to be thrilled with life.


Here is what I have learnt. We all make judgements. They are intuitive. They are evolutionarily required for the survival of the species. If a man runs at you in the street with a knife, you need to make the judgement that you are probably not safe, and should flee. Judgement is intrinsic, so we must recognise and listen to it. To not listen can have very damaging consequences. I hope this doesn't come across as me advocating the discrimination of people who have different values to our own. It's about self care and recognition. Likewise people also need to take responsibility for their actions and realise that a consequence of them may be that they will be judged by another in the future.

Learning to act right (12)… Choosing to end a marriage

Learning to act right (12)… Choosing to end a marriage
Torrey Orton
July 14, 2010


Here's another tale of growth occurring, as it often does, on the back of division and depression. This one emerges from an explicit conflict between two publically accepted versions of right behaviour in the mind and heart of a friend charged with modelling right behaviour for others. David presents this conflict in clear and unflinching terms. More importantly, he's unblinking in assessing his own struggle to do the right thing. Like many such struggles, his tale bears tinges of the unresolved or the uncompleted aspects of the conflict. Doing it can never be fully over it, perhaps.

Choosing to end a marriage

In the late 70s I found myself struggling to deal with my marriage which was at a terminal stage. The major struggle involved dealing with two ethical considerations which were in conflict.


I was a Baptist minister working as an independent Christian education consultant, which meant that I was not engaged in pastoral care of a congregation but I was a member of a local church where I and my family worshiped.


I was part of a tradition and culture that expected any minister to set an example to others of upright Christian living and this was reinforced by my mother, a very strict, conservative practicing Christian. This meant that a minister's marriage had to be sound and above reproach – or at least to appear to be so no matter what the reality might be. This expectation weighed heavily on me to such an extent that I took far too long to acknowledge that the marriage was anything but sound.


While working with a church in the USA (in the early 70s) I was exposed to a different tradition and culture, one that took a different view of what it meant to be an example. This culture perceived that the important thing about setting an example was to be open and honest about personal failings and about the struggle to live up to the expectations of what 'being a Christian' meant. I was attracted by this perspective yet I did not find it easy to take on board as part of my ethical framework.


When the marriage eventually got to the point of crumbling I found these two ethical considerations were creating an internal dilemma as I faced the question of what action I was going to take.


I found myself having to make a choice about whether to leave the marriage or not. When I reached a point where I felt that a decision had to be made I struggled to find the willpower (courage?) to actually do it and looked for help from external sources. The following extract from my journal at the time describes the experience:

An advert in the Saturday paper for a furnished country cottage caught my attention but did not produce any action. Sunday morning's sermon not only had a strong note of "Be strong and trust me to meet all your needs" but was illustrated by a story of a woman who separated from her husband by taking a country cottage!!! My response was not to do anything till Monday, taking the risk that it would still be available. Before phoning I had a time of prayer and Bible reading from Psalm 144 "You......rescue your servant David. He is my protector and defender, my shelter and saviour, in whom I trust for safety." With this reassurance I rang the landlady, arranged to view the cottage and then took up the rental.

Although that helped me to finally make the choice to leave the marriage it did not create a situation of subsequent clarity. My journal reflects an ongoing struggle for almost a year before I was finally content that I had made the right choice and was able to adjust to a new way of life.


Looking back some 30 years later I can still recall the pain of the struggle to resolve the ethical considerations described above and am fascinated that I could not earlier find the strength within myself to implement the choice I eventually made. Perhaps this is an indication of the deep-seated indoctrination that occurs within the conservative Christian tradition and the consequent struggle that is experienced by anyone wanting to find freedom from it.


David J Scott - 280610

Being here (4) …. Being responsible…

Being here (4) …. Being responsible…
Torrey Orton
July 12, 2010

Being responsible and taking responsibility for…

My friend Hamid likes being and I am moved by the care he gives to his being…steadily pursuing its latest manifestation(s) in shaping his future (and mine to the extent that my doing and his overlap). I was engaged with my being early one recent morn – a time when I am most able to contemplate uninterruptedly. My topic was responsibility. I was musing upon it, pondering* it…my responsibility, or lack of it, in a recent event.


I became aware that taking responsibility and being responsible are different moments in the process of responsibility. Being responsible - that is, having a source of responsibility in me - is the pre-condition for taking responsibility and consequently acting responsibly. To act responsibly I have to already, all the time, have the need and intention to be responsible quietly present to me. In this sense, my being responsible is the origin or source (here the noun matters as the verb did above) of my doing things responsibly (or trying to!).


And here we can segue into ethics – both learning and acting – gliding on the back of character or foundational values, without which we cannot take action, ethical or otherwise. Being responsible is one of these values. Taking responsibility for specific actions is the public expression of character.


Actively denying responsibility for something, especially if not explicitly having been asked to take responsibility for it, is a backhanded acknowledgement of a self-perception of having actual or possible responsibility for it – guilt by defensiveness?. You can see this at work in public sex scandals when the implicated (eg. footy team managements and the users of their public faces for profit – advertisers, would be celebs, etc.) protest the innocence or mitigate the undenied behaviour of the accused. Or, see the recent David Jones CEO resignation for a higher class of the same predicament for corporate boards.


Back to being…
So, when we are working with people about being, we might entice them into experiencing their own values and virtues. Enticements might be invitations to tell stories about challenging events in their lives of which they, or which others who they value, are proud or ashamed. Both 'good' and 'bad' experiences (hence pride and shame as markers) can be sources of value finding because they are heavily loaded with various feelings and so self-traceable along the tracks of one's history. Values have to be enticed into view often because they reside in the foundations of our being and are shy of the light of day. Values and virtues tend to be a bit self-abnegating or they can easily turn into vices (pride, hubris, arrogance…).


In the process of seeking and bringing virtues and values to light we implicitly disclose the structures of being, perhaps. For instance, when acting responsibly we are in tune with ourselves and experience our intentions as emerging smoothly from the circumstances requiring them - a kind of mild flow experience.


Depleted replicas?
We learn to be responsible by doing and being with others – the active processes of social role modelling. Learning responsibility, among others, takes years, the sort of learning only an upbringing can provide. Hence, it takes a village to raise a child. It is possible in our times, freer of villages than ever, that those aspects of being inhabited by virtues and values will be thinly populated by depleted models. A google of their spiritual entrails may reveal bloodless, because unblooded, replicas of our historical values and virtues.

Being on the edge of nothingness??


*it's hard to know the right verb here, not because the action is evanescent (pondering is just a bulky musing) but because the subject assumes a different materiality with the action expressed in it! Responsibility is as often engaging for its presence as its absence, in which case the feeling is heavy and its trigger the sadness of disappointed, though justifiable, expectations of self or others.